Like a Virgin: My Journey through Madonna's Discography

Why I'm Listening to Every Single Madonna Album For the First Time

As someone who still uses iTunes and collects MP3s, I've become somewhat obsessed with collecting cherished but forgotten songs from my childhood. I listen and scour through playlists of "the best [genre] songs of [decade]" in search for songs or artists that I enjoyed while growing up but have since forgotten about. Sometimes I'm delighted to find that multiple songs I fondly remember are by the same artist. Usually it's no more than a handful.

Madonna in 1983 during her first tour

So when I realized that Madonna was responsible for multiple songs I cherished from not one, not two, but three decades of music, I took notice. It seemed to me that while many artist's careers span several decades, very few are able to stay relevant to the pop radio stations for as long. This discovery warranted more of my attention. Not only did I want to comb through her hits to find more hidden gems from my childhood, but I felt compelled to listen through all of Madonna's music out of sheer curiosity for how an artist could make such an impact for such an extended period of time.

So began my self-imposed quest to listen through every single Madonna studio album and single in chronological order for the first time in my life. To track my thoughts, I'm going to document here what I thought of each of her albums and pick a single favorite track from each. I'll then recap the experience and my thoughts on Madonna's career as a whole, ending with a declaration of my favorite album and, if possible, favorite track.

But first, for context: I knew very little about Madonna or her music before embarking on this quest. Mostly, I was aware that she was a popular artist and that she made a song that Weird Al parodied and Tarantino was obsessed with dissecting. I had heard plenty of her hits before, but I didn't consciously know that she was the artist responsible for creating all of them.

DISCLAIMER: I am by no measure a music expert, and my thoughts will reflect as such. I just like listening to music, so my apologies if I overlook some brilliant technique or meaning that better-trained and educated ears would pick out.

Madonna (1983)

I'm a fan of 80s pop music, so I was quite excited to listen through this album and I was not disappointed. Madonna's self-titled debut is quite a fun listen, and I had extra fun in comparing it to the debut albums of my favorite female pop stars from today. The album starts off strong with the incredibly danceable "Lucky Star" and this energy is wonderfully sustained throughout the whole album. Even when "I Know It" feels like it falls just short of missing the mark and might indicate the album's second half trending downward, "Holiday" quickly erases all doubt that the second half will be anything less than stellar.

Overall, I love how 80s this album is. The synths and guitars just make me happy.

Favorite Track: "Lucky Star"
While I think "Holiday" is an objectively better and stronger song (and it's very tempting to claim it as my favorite of the album), there's just something incredibly charming about "Lucky Star" that I can't put my finger on. Maybe I'm just a sucker for how 80s it sounds.

Like a Virgin (1984)

Coming out only a year later, this album feels like a natural extension of the previous, albeit there's an added confidence to the music and vocal performance. "Material Girl" is a banger of an opening track, but "Like a Virgin" is the obvious standout here for not only the quality of the music but also the lyrical content. Where "Physical Attraction" on her debut album felt like Madonna somewhat hesitantly dipping her toe into the water of playful sexual content, "Like a Virgin" is her confidently diving all the way in. You can hear just how much fun she's having in recording the vocals, and the music wonderfully matches her energy. This song is especially fun to listen to after learning that it (and her performance of it on the 1984 VMAs) was controversial at the time, because not only is it tame by today's standards but it's evidence of her influence on future female pop stars and music as a whole.

That said, the album doesn't grip me as much as the self-titled debut did, despite the quality being undeniably superior. There's just something special about that debut album that I can't put my finger on. However, the inclusion of "Into the Groove" on the 1985 re-issue definitely helps to boost the album's overall quality.

Favorite Track: "Like a Virgin"

This was another tough choice, with "Material Girl" being a solid contender. But in the end, the enthusiastic vocal performance and thumping beat of "Like a Virgin" won me over.

Movie Singles: "Crazy For You" & "Gambler" (1985)

So the movie these are from (Vision Quest) looks pretty mediocre, but oh man the song "Crazy For You" is anything but. Such a beautiful, emotional romance song. I'd be surprised if this wasn't a popular song at weddings, though I wasn't fortunate enough for it to be played at mine. On the other hand, "Gambler" is a playful dance song that would feel right at home on Madonna's self-titled album, but as a single it just doesn't stand out as much as others in her discography.

Favorite Track: "Crazy For You"
Obviously.

True Blue (1986)

This album feels like a real step forward. It's like Madonna has combined the heart and soul of her debut album with the skill and confidence of her second. As has become the norm, the album starts off very strong with the dance singles "Papa Don't Preach" and "Open Your Heart" before diving into the more diverse pop music sound.

As a bonus, I had to double take for the song "Live to Tell" because it turns out its intro was the source of a slowed-down sample in the opening song of one of my favorite vaporwave albums, and while it was odd to get used to the normal-speed version at first, it was a pleasant surprise to finally hear the sample in its original context.

Overall, unlike her previous two albums, no song really feels like a lull here.

Favorite Track: "Open Your Heart"
While this album is full of great tracks, "Open Your Heart" was the obvious pick for me. Not only was it a childhood favorite so it's got nostalgia points, but it sounds like the type of track you could set a badass montage to—it gets me pumped up!

Movie Singles: Who's That Girl soundtrack (1987)

Wow this movie looks bad. James Foley has had an interesting directing career, from the excellent Glengarry Glen Ross and some solid work on critically-praised modern television shows to the nearly unwatchable Fifty Shades sequels. Anyway, that's irrelevant because I only need to listen to the Madonna songs from the soundtrack.

"Who's That Girl" is a decent enough theme song, but it doesn't really stand up on its own. "Causing a Commotion" fares a bit better as a single. "The Look of Love" is a solid song with a nicely executed ethereal quality. "Can't Stop" is a passable dance pop song.

Favorite Track: "Causing a Commotion"

None of these songs did much for me, but "Causing a Commotion" came the closest.

Like a Prayer (1989)

Coming up on the last Madonna album of the 80s, Like a Prayer starts out strong with the title track followed by "Express Yourself," followed by an assortment of some more experimental tracks. While I'm not really a fan of tracks like "Promise to Try," "Dear Jessie," "Oh Father," or "Spanish Eyes" (so many ballads!) that stand out as experimental for Madonna's style, they're certainly well made and hold artistic value that I'm sure others enjoy very much. For my part, however, "Cherish" comes off as classic Madonna in the best way, while "Keep It Together" comes close to scratching the same itch while also containing qualities that sound distinctly of the 90s pop variety.

Overall, I'm not a huge fan of this album, as it's a bit too ballad-heavy for me and both "Keep It Together" and "Act of Contrition" smell a bit too thick of the 90s pop that I'm not very fond of. Still, the three tracks I do enjoy are very strong additions to Madonna's catalog. I just worry where the 90s will take her music.

As a side note: I had just listened to Tove Lo's album Lady Wood the day before listening to Like a Prayer, and it was interesting to see the similarities in the album art of each, though by Tove Lo's own admission the homage was completely unintentional.

Favorite Track: "Like a Prayer"
Easy pick. This one has gotten stuck in my head several times since I listened to it. The mixture of choir-like verses with a catchy pop chorus is brilliant.

I'm Breathless: Music from and Inspired by the Film Dick Tracy (1990)

I almost overlooked this album completely since it's technically considered a soundtrack album, and actually only discovered it after first moving onward and listening to Madonna's first proper studio album of the 90s: Erotica. That said, I'm very, very glad I went back and found this album. The jazz and swing influences work really well here (or at least really appeal to me) and go a long way toward showing just how versatile Madonna is.

"He's a Man," and "Hanky Panky" are particularly strong tracks in the beginning of the album. "I'm Going Bananas" comes out of nowhere as a salsa song where Madonna puts on a Spanish accent, which may or may not be considered offensive today but it works. "Back in Business" does a great job alternating seamlessly from mysterious dreamlike jazz to upbeat swing. Especially noteworthy is the transition from the classic swing style of "Now I'm Following You (Pt. 1)" to the modern pop aesthetics of "Now I'm Following You (Pt. 2)," which breathes new life into the end of the album — concluding with the amazing classic single "Vogue."

Favorite Track: "Vogue"
I was really tempted to pick one of the jazz or swing songs for their uniqueness, or "Now I'm Following You (Pt. 2)" for basically inventing the electro swing genre, but alas, "Vogue" is just too good. I'd bet almost nobody can think of a fashion runway without thinking of this song.

Erotica (1992)

Wow, talk about a genre shift. This album is pretty much all in the style of trance, though the track "Where Life Begins" gives me trip-hop vibes. Not only is this reassuring that Madonna's music may not have succumbed to the trends of 90s era pop, but as someone nostalgic for 90s trance and trip-hop this album comes off as a pleasant surprise. "Erotica," "Deeper and Deeper," "Where Life Begins," "Bad Girl," "Rain," and "Did You Do It?" are personal favorites.

What's also great about this album is its apparent impact on modern pop music. While there were eight years and several albums between this and her controversial appearance on the VMAs performing "Like a Virgin," this album marks Madonna firmly re-establishing herself as pushing the boundaries about what's appropriate to talk and sing about, with specific emphasis on sexuality and femininity. Some quick research shows that this era in Madonna's career was in fact rife with controversy thanks to this album, a coffee table book with explicit photos of Madonna, and an erotic thriller film starring the singer. Being that this was only 1992, I think it's safe to say she set the stage for the likes of Lady Gaga and Miley Cyrus to push boundaries and stir up controversy.

Favorite Track: "Rain"
This track just stands out from the rest. It's beautiful.

Movie Single: "I'll Remember" (1994)

This song is just fantastic, and it was one of my childhood favorites. Words cannot describe how happy I was to rediscover this song and find that it is every bit as beautiful as I remember it being. I love it.

Favorite Track: "I'll Remember"
Well this was an easy pick.

Bedtime Stories (1994)

In yet another genre shift, this album features many R&B inspired tracks. This is also the first Madonna album where the first few songs didn't completely grab me. That isn't to say that these songs are bad, of course, but they just didn't excite me for the album as much as is typical of the first three tracks of any Madonna album up to this point. In fact, this album as a whole is lacking in the energy that I've come to expect and love about Madonna's work, though I suspect that's perhaps due to the R&B influences resulting in a more relaxing sound.

In any case, I'm relieved that this album still manages to steer away from the trends of pop music in the 90s, and there are definitely tracks that stand out to me. Specifically, "Don't Stop," "Forbidden Love," and "Bedtime Story," the latter of which sounds like it could fit at home on a Massive Attack album, which I totally dig.

Favorite Track: "Bedtime Story"
This song reminds me so much of classic Massive Attack that I couldn't even consider anything else on the album being even close to my favorite.

Singles: "You'll See" and "One More Chance" (1995)

Taken from the compilation Something To Remember, "You'll See" is the standout track for me of these two, especially thanks to the growing intensity of the track and the accompanying Spanish-style guitar. "One More Chance" is solid (especially the latter half), but not nearly as strong by comparison.

Favorite Track: "You'll See"

As I said, this one's got a great buildup.

Please note that I'm skipping the Evita singles, since those songs were merely sung/covered by Madonna but were written for a stage play.

Ray of Light (1998)

I think "Drowned World/Substitute for Love" is one of the best opening tracks to any Madonna album so far. Not only was the new style totally unexpected (I should just start expecting the unexpected at this point) but it single-handedly rebuilt my hype for listening through all of Madonna's albums. Once again, Madonna is experimenting with genres here and this time I can confidently say she is totally nailing it.

To further emphasize how hard this album hit me, I should mention that up until this point I was still considering Madonna's first album to be my favorite. After all, I'm a sucker for 80s dance pop. But then, a mere two songs into this album, I began to question if that were still the case.

Continuing through the album, "Ray of Light" had me bobbing my head and tapping my feet at my work desk like nothing that had come before. "Candy Perfume Girl" had me grooving to the beat. "Sky Fits Heaven" pleasantly reminded me of some early BT music. "Frozen" stood out in a way I have no clever words for. Oh, and as a relatively new father I really connected with "Little Star."

Favorite Track: "Candy Perfume Girl"

This was a tough picks given the album has so many fun tracks, but my gut says this song is going to stick with me the longest.

Movie Single: Beautiful Stranger (1999)

Closing out the 90s is this track from the first Austin Powers movie, and while it's not particularly noteworthy, it is a solid track to end Madonna's second decade on.

Favorite Track: "Beautiful Stranger"

Another easy pick!

Music (2000)

What the hell? Just when you think she's done making mainstream hits she comes out with songs like "Music" and "Don't Tell Me," the latter of which was a favorite of mine in the early 00s. It kind of feels like this is the first album since the 1980s where Madonna is making mainstream dance pop rather than experimenting with lesser known genres. Fortunately for me, I'm a sucker for dance pop. The album also does a good job of playing within the genre to find different sounds, but that's pretty typical of Madonna. Overall I'd say this is up there with her best albums so far. "What It Feels Like for a Girl" is a track that especially stood out for me, though there's really nothing on this album that I didn't really enjoy.

Perhaps my biggest takeaway with this album is that you can't judge an album by its cover, or maybe it's that the marketing team should have chosen a cover image that better represented the album's sound? I was worried going in that this would be a country pop album (I'm not a country fan) based on the very obviously country-inspired album cover, but fortunately that wasn't the case at all. I'm convinced that there must be a reason for the country visual aesthetic, but I'm not smart enough to figure out what it might be.

Favorite Track: "Don't Tell Me"
"What It Feels Like for a Girl" is a close second here, but "Don't Tell Me" is just too catchy to deny. That being said, I could see the former track overtaking the latter as my favorite on repeated listens, but that's just speculation.

American Life (2003)

This is the first time that the first track on a Madonna album came off as uneven to me. While "American Life" sounds like a technically well-made song, it also sounded deliberately inaccessible. The album has a rebellious and somewhat somber quality to it, which is highlighted by the album cover's black, white, and red graffiti-style artwork. This change in attitude seemingly comes out of nowhere from an artist who seemed pretty high on life up until this point — until you realize that this is Madonna's first post-9/11 album, and then it all makes sense. That event and the ensuing war had a huge impact on American culture. I saw a similar shift in 2007 with Nine Inch Nails' politically-charged album Year Zero, and of course everyone knows how hugely popular Green Day's rebellious album American Idiot was in 2004.

As for the music itself, there's nothing quite as instantly lovable as the singles on previous albums, but there's still some really good stuff here. "I'm so Stupid." "Love Profusion," and "Nothing Fails" stand out in particular. "Die Another Day" is a decent track for the album but a totally weird addition to the 007 theme song catalog that I always assumed was by Britney Spears. Overall it's a solid if somewhat uneven album.

Favorite Track: "Love Profusion"

Nothing really stood out to me as an obvious pick on this album, but this song came closest.

Confessions on a Dance Floor (2005)

Ah, here we are back in familiar territory. "Hung Up" starts this album off on the right foot, "Future Lovers" stood out as a fun track that I was surprised wasn't a single, and "Jump" is in a great position on the album to help carry the energy through to the end. While it's great to hear Madonna returning to upbeat dance pop here, it's admittedly a bit disappointing that she's experimenting less than I'm used to here, though I'm sure there's plenty more of that to come as well. Overall, this is a solid dance album, though there's not a lot of catchy pop to sink my teeth into, if that makes any sense.

Favorite Track: "Hung Up"

Easy pick. Nothing else on the album really comes close.

Charity Single: Hey You (2007)

Charity songs tend to be weighed down by their obvious preachy message that doesn't allow for much creativity, lyrically, and are typically ballads, regardless of the musical style of the musician(s) involved. That said, this one's at least not totally unoriginal, lyrically, and the ballad style comes off pretty sincere instead of forced and obligatory. I'd take this any day over that appalling "Earth" charity track from Lil Dicky.

Favorite Track: "Hey You"
Is this joke of picking a favorite track from a single song getting old yet? Probably.

Hard Candy (2008)

Ah yes, here's the hip-hop influence of the 00's creeping in. Despite the fact that I don't recall ever hearing "Candy Shop" before, it sounded very familiar to me, likely because I started dating my hip-hop-loving wife around this time so this style makes me nostalgic for those early days of our budding relationship. Speaking of, "4 Minutes" is an absolute banger that really takes me back, since I definitely heard this one several times before thanks to my wife, who was not only into hip-hop but was and remains a huge fan of Justin Timberlake. After these two tracks, the album continues to deliver plenty of fun tunes. "Beat Goes On" was an especially stand-out track for me, thanks in part to the surprise appearance of a wild Kanye West. Overall, this is a very catchy album that I think holds up very well, especially as a snapshot of what style of music was popular at that time.

Favorite Track: "4 Minutes"
Sometimes I wish I  could be more surprising and pick a song other than one of the hit singles, but then I hear songs like this and remember why those were hit singles.

Singles: "Celebration" and "Revolver," (2009)

Closing out the third decade of her career is the compilation album Celebration, featuring two new songs. Unfortunately, neither of them really does much to stand out.

Favorite Track: "Revolver"
"Celebration" just sounds way too forgettable, so "Revolver" wins by default.

A Pause to Reflect on the Pop Industry

I think it's important to note here as we move into the 2010s that it was during this time that Katy Perry and Lady Gaga both exploded onto the pop music scene. I'm no expert in musical trends, but I know that Katy Perry and Lady Gaga were huge in moving the genre forward into the next decade. In fact, both put out their successful debut albums in the same year as Madonna's Hard Candy (One of the Boys and The Fame, respectively), but by the time Madonna released her follow up MDNA, Lady Gaga also released The Fame Monster EP and Born This Way, solidifying her position as a huge presence in the industry (and someone who I now realize clearly drew influence from Madonna), and likewise Katy Perry had also released Teenage Dream, which I'm convinced is one of the best pop albums of the last 20 years. These, along with many other talented artists, emerged as new and exciting voices in the industry (Taylor Swift also notably shifted to pop music in 2012). Although Madonna had impressively managed to stay relevant for three decades, it seems to me that her work going forward would be cut out for her.

MDNA (2012)

Here's where my expectations have once again fooled me. By this point in her career I was expecting the unexpected, which is to say I expected MDNA to be more experimental, but it comes off as yet another mainstream dance pop album similar to Hard Candy, Confessions on a Dance Floor, and Music. Sure, the style itself continues to evolve with the use of harder beats and occasional dubstep production and the like, but it feels like Madonna's magic and charm has been sacrificed in exchange for generic danceable beats. While there was a stretch of albums where I felt consistently surprised and impressed by Madonna's skills and willingness to try new things, this album feels like a low point in her career.

As a point of comparison, while the album Bedtime Stories didn't do much for me, personally, I could still appreciate the quality and effort put into it. MDNA, however, doesn't feel like there's much to truly appreciate in it. There's nothing new and surprising happening. "Gang Bang," "I'm a Sinner," and "Some Girls" might be the only songs I enjoyed on this album. While "Give Me All your Luvin'" has a catchy beat, it comes off as somewhat flat and the addition of Nicki Minaj's vocals doesn't do it any favors. Overall, I got the sense while listening to the album that the tracks were incomplete demos rather than the fully-polished songs I'd come to expect.

Favorite Track: "Gang Bang"

I guess?

Rebel Heart (2015)

My first thoughts when hearing the first song "Living For Love" on this album were "thank goodness she's back with something good." Likewise, "Devil Pray" eased any concerns I had that the opening track would be a one-off in terms of quality, and proved to be an exceptionally good track in its own right (the late great Avicci's influence in this track is obvious). Heck, even Nicki Minaj is utilized well in "Bitch I'm Madonna" such that I wasn't repulsed by her inclusion in the song. The "HeartBreakCity" ballad even sounds like it somehow fits perfectly in the overall sound of the album, despite my prior dislike of Madonna's ballads — and furthermore "Body Shop" (which is almost like a ballad as well) took a surprisingly good turn at about the halfway point.

Other songs I just need to mention because they surprised me with how great they were: "Ghosttown," "Illuminati," and "Holy Water."

Is this Madonna's best album since Music? I think it might be.

Favorite Track: "Body Shop"
This song just grabbed my attention and didn't let go. The first half is already beautiful musically and vocally, and the change in the second half takes it to another level.

Madame X (2019)

Here we are at the end of our journey and the end of yet another decade of Madonna music. After four albums straight (and almost two whole decades) of pretty mainstream dance pop, this album features a welcome return to Madonna's penchant for experimentation that made up the majority of her 90s albums. "Medellin" sets the stage perfectly with Spanish guest vocals by Maluma and a beat to match. "Dark Ballet" continues to surprise with heavy use of a Nutcracker sample and vocoder, and "God Control" mixes it up again with a funk-inspired beat and a groovy 6 minute run time.

Unfortunately, although there's a lot of creativity and talent on display in this album, it's devoid of the type of catchy dance pop songs that draw me in. None of the songs really stood out as must-listen to me on this album. It's hard to describe the disappointment and guilt I feel when I hear music that's obviously very well-made, but just doesn't do anything for me. That disappointment and guilt is greatly multiplied by the fact that this is the last Madonna album in my journey.

Favorite Track: "God Control"
I may not love any songs on this album, but I liked this one the most.

Reflecting on Madonna's Whole Discography

There you have it. I just listened to all of Madonna's discography in chronological order for the first time in my life. I honestly wasn't expecting to enjoy her music as much as I did in the first two decades, and although there's a certain magic missing in the later two decades of her career, I also wasn't expecting to find so many of the memorable songs in that latter half as I did.

Pop is an interesting genre for me. I've never had a favorite pop artist in the way that I have favorite artists of almost every other genre because while I can fall completely in love with a good pop song, there's something about the commercial or superficial quality of it that always fails to make me connect with it on any deeper level. I just don't connect the creators as much as I do with those of other genres. I started to think that was going to change as I listened through Madonna's first handful of albums, but then I got to the 90s albums and the sound that had defined Madonna's personality for me—the thing that I connected with—disappeared completely and was replaced with decade-appropriate genre experimentation. My connection to Madonna faded even more with the onset of the 2000s albums, because while I very much enjoy many of those dance pop songs, they're such a far departure from the sound that I fell in love with that it's hard to make peace with the fact that they're from the same artist.

Madonna in 2019 during her most recent tour

Therein lies the challenge with being a pop star. The trends in the sound of pop music are constantly changing. New, younger artists are innovating all the time. I don't know if Madonna's style changed with the times because she was trying to remain relevant, if she was genuinely moved by the changes in the genre and wished to try her hand at them, or if she just always made exactly what she wanted to despite what was popular at the time, but as a first-time listener it's jarring to hear the changes. While an artist like Nine Inch Nails is constantly experimenting and changing over the course of three decades, it's always within the confines of some larger idea of what that band is meant to sound like so that even something totally new and unique sounds unquestionably like it belongs with something released two decades earlier. I don't know that I could listen to "Lucky Star" next to "God Control" and get the same sensation.

That said, this was quite an enjoyable journey. I've never listened to any artist with so many albums through from beginning to end like that, and the fact that Madonna's style changed so much only made it that much more interesting. I am now a lifelong fan of some of the songs I discovered, and although I can't say I'm a lifelong fan of Madonna as well, I will certainly continue to watch her career and listen to each release with much interest. And so, without further ado:

Favorite Album: Uhhh.....

I really thought I was going to be able to pick a favorite album out of the bunch, but it might still be too soon to determine. Plus some of the albums are so vastly different that it's difficult to compare. How about I pick my favorite album of each decade, instead? Okay, here we go:

Favorite 80s Madonna Album: Like a Virgin

Yeah, I know I said I didn't like it as much as her debut album in this very blog, but that was only my initial reaction. I have since grown to love this album so much more. Not only was my initial reaction of this album based on the original release that didn't include "Into the Groove," and not only do the songs "Like a Virgin" and "Material Girl" hit even harder than the hits from her debut album, but songs like "Shoo-Bee-Doo" that I didn't even make note of above have grown on me immensely since my first listen.

Favorite 90s Madonna Album: Ray of Light

Madonna in 1987, just because it's a nice photo

It was pretty much between this and Erotica, which are similar in as many ways as they are different. In the end, Ray of Light edges forward with a few more songs that stand out well on their own rather than relying on the tone of the rest of the album to hold up.

Really though, the best Madonna album of the 90s is the With Honors soundtrack, because her one and only song on it "I'll Remember" is better than everything else she put out that decade combined, and it might still be my all-time favorite song of hers.

Favorite 2000s Madonna Album: Music

This pick was easy. Tracks like "Don't Tell Me," "What It Feels Like for a Girl," and "Music" are the highlights, but everything on this album is catchy, unique, and fun.

Favorite 2010s Madonna Album: Rebel Heart

While this is the only Madonna album of the 2010s that I actually like, I want to make it clear that I like it very, very much. In fact, not only is it my favorite of the decade, but I think it's in my top five favorite Madonna albums overall as well. This is the album that reassures me that, while she might not always make music that appeals to me and she might even stumble overall from time to time, Madonna's not done making great music.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have so much other music to catch up on.
-Ryan

Why and How I Created ANOTHER Blade Runner Ambient Soundscape

Okay Kyle. This is for you.

My Blade Runner Ambient Soundscape has grown more popular than I expected it to. What started off as a fun little project just for myself has (at the time of writing) 216,738 combined views/listens on YouTube and a combined watch time of 6.7 million minutes, or 111,666 hours. All of those big numbers are hard to fathom, but what's even harder for me to wrap my head around is that, since those videos were posted, I've gone from 17 subscribers to 655.

That's 638 more people who want to be notified whenever I post a new video. Reasonably, that's an oodle of people who are telling me that they love the soundscape and want me to make more. Unfortunately, I mostly use YouTube for uploading non-soundscape things like my relatively mundane and personal monthly 1 Second Everyday videos. Furthermore, I am not in any way, shape, or form, a professional sound designer, musician, or audiophile. Making soundscapes was not my true calling in life nor my passion. I just happened to have a clear idea in my head for a thing I wanted to exist that didn't exist yet, and I just happened to have the knowledge, tools, and skill set to make it myself, so I made it.

However, there's an anonymous quote that I try to live by. It goes like this:

"Whatever your talent is, don't be precious or stingy with it. Give it away to as many people as generously as you can to the point of exhaustion."

When I first heard that quote I decided that it should be my motto, but I'd never gotten a chance to put it into action. Naturally, this was my chance. Regardless of my own doubts, I needed to make another soundscape. Unlike the first one, though, this one wouldn't be for me. This one would be for everyone who subscribed or left a comment praising my work and thanking me for my effort. This one would be a gift.

This one would be tough.

Blade Runner 2049 is not the same movie as the original Blade Runner. It doesn't have the same legacy, the same tone, or even the same type of score. Whereas I created my original Blade Runner soundscape around the foundation the original movie set up – where the use of slowed-down music, ambient rain sound effects, and wind chimes came naturally from the film itself – a soundscape based on Blade Runner 2049 would essentially need to be shoehorned into the mold that the first one had set for it. I'm sure Denis Villeneuve felt exactly the same way about filming it as I did about making my soundscape from it. Yup. Exactly the same.

So I told myself what all artists should probably tell themselves before working on a sequel to a beloved work; "It will never be as good as the original. The very fact that it is a sequel diminishes its quality by taking away the spontaneity and uniqueness that is so necessary for any art to stand out. People will hate it. People may even hate me for making it. That's okay, because in the end I'll have made something that someone else might really enjoy."

With that out of the way, it was time to get to work.

This Time, Let's Start with the Art

Since I didn't want to forget how to Photoshop the album artwork because it took a while to figure out the first time around, that's the first thing I did. Aside from brainstorm, I mean, but I'll get to that later.

For obvious reasons, I wanted to use the same technique on the album art for the 2049 soundscape as I did for the first soundscape (which I'll refer to as the 2019 soundscape from here on out, since that's the year the first film takes place in, for the uneducated). While there was one pretty obvious candidate for which scene to adapt, I watched the movie again hoping to be inspired by something I hadn't thought of.

First I tried a scene that was somewhat reminiscent of the one I used for 2019:

While the result is pretty cool, I felt that it was lacking in some qualities that made the 2019 one work better. Perhaps the largest flaw was (aside from the text being nearly unreadable) that this scene isn't very iconic, so it's not easy to recognize that this is a scene from Blade Runner 2049. Realizing how important this quality was, I gave in to my initial gut idea and applied the same effects to the most iconic scene in the whole film:

I had to do some tweaking to the effect in order to make the text stand out, but in the end it was pretty obvious that this was the best scene to use. Now that that was out of the way, all I had to do was make the actual soundscape. You know, the actual hard part.

The Same but Different

Sequels are hard. Did I already say that?

Taking Kyle's request literally, I began brainstorming sound effects I could use to differentiate the 2049 soundscape from the 2019 soundscape. Since snow is unique to 2049 and is seen quite a bit in the film, the most obvious idea was to replace the sound of pouring rain with ... uh ... the sound of falling snow? Okay, fine. Because the only sound associated with falling snow is a chilly whistling wind, and that's not really as relaxing for most people to listen to, I decided that I'd make a minor concession in the uniqueness of the soundscape by keeping the rain – though I was determined to make the rain sound more like 2049 rain than 2019 rain, if possible. I figured I could do that by using the sound of a heavier downpour, pairing the rain sound with a cold wind, and alternating between different ambient sound effects layered on top of the rain such as Kyle's idea of crashing waves.

Because this project felt like a gift I was making for the fans (especially Kyle) rather than a little project for myself, I wanted to get an idea for what it was the fans actually wanted in a 2049 soundscape. To find out, I asked the r/BladeRunner community on Reddit what it was they would want in weather effects (as well as if anyone had a way to extract the 5.1 audio mix from the movie as separate files, but more on that later). Fortunately, I got replies that were both enthusiastic and clever. These ideas included heavier rain, subtle wind, snow hitting water, crashing waves at the sea wall, and the throat singing from the "Wallace" track on the soundtrack. Some folks even suggested ideas for the "sounds of the city" version, such as the clink of whiskey being poured into a glass, a dog panting, and bees buzzing like in the Las Vegas scene, or the sound of footsteps in the snow.

Fast forward to the actual creation of the soundscape, and despite all the great ideas being thrown at the wall, there was only one option that was really practical for making a sequel to the original soundscape while retaining the same relaxing qualities. I needed to stick with rain. Just rain. I tried pairing it with different cold wind sounds, but the results were either too creepy, too subtle, or too much. To make the soundscape unique, I went looking for an ambient rain track I could use that was heavier than the original while still sounding like it existed in the same setting.

To elaborate: some heavy rain soundscapes sound more like they were recorded in a jungle or from inside a car rather than in a city, and even then they might have the sounds of passing cars, leaking gutters, people talking, or too thick of rain hitting dense puddles. I needed the rain to be just right.

For a couple months I couldn't find the perfect rain, so I just used the 2019 soundscape rain as a placeholder. Fortunately, about a month ago, someone uploaded a brand new rain recording to the internet that fit my criteria just perfectly. The timing couldn't have been better.

Marking Time

Speaking of time, in the original soundscape I used the sound of faint wind chimes to mark every 10 minutes, which was meant to help those who wanted to track time keep it (such as for timed meditation) while allowing people who wanted to lose time ignore it completely, since wind chimes are featured in the movie enough to make them just another part of the experience. I wanted to do something similar for the 2049 soundscape, but I ran into the big problem that comes with doing a sequel such as this: there was no iconic sound that immediately came to me that could be used to subtly mark time in the same way as the wind chimes did. I managed to brainstorm several different ideas, all of which failed compared to the wind chimes when tested. These included:

• A Singing Bowl — this was too harsh
• Sound from beginning of "Pilot" — this was too soft
• Peter and the Wolf — this was too distracting
• BR2049 Chime (a singing bowl-like noise from the actual movie that I discovered) — this was both too low and too distracting

Much to my dismay, after testing out all of my ideas at different volumes, none of them worked quite as well as the wind chimes. I had to make yet another concession of uniqueness and keep the wind chimes.

Stretching the Score

As with the 2019 soundscape, the ambience in the 2049 soundscape comes not only from the pouring rain, but also from the sounds of the movie's score stretched out to nearly unrecognizable lengths. Personally, I love the Blade Runner 2049 score that Hans Zimmer and Benjamin Wallfisch came up with, but it is very (intentionally) different from that of Vangelis' score for the original. While it fits the movie perfectly, it doesn't have the same beautiful dreamlike quality to it. It's darker, dirtier, not nearly as iconic, and doesn't stand on its own (without context) as well as the original. I knew that these differences would drastically impact the quality and tone of the new soundscape as compared to the first, and I had to come to terms with that being completely out of my control.

Still, I knew there were some profound moments of beauty in the score that would work perfectly for the soundscape. To find the right tracks, I simply listened to the soundtrack on loop and noted what songs I thought would do the job, or, in some cases, which songs would need to be edited in order to do the job (for example, I thought the second half of the track "2049" could work, but the first half was full of booming bass and eerie ambience that didn't fit what I was looking for).

I then stretched the songs out 6× using Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch and listened to those versions several times to see if any potential issues revealed themselves that way. I was especially listening for tones that might irritate others even if they seemed normal given the reference point, since my wife and I found out that we couldn't sleep to the original soundscape because there's a loud, high-pitched tone that wakes us up at around 1 hour and 50 minutes every single time – something I wish I'd noticed and corrected during its creation. This led to me eliminating tracks like "2049" because, although it contains the incredibly beautiful synth melody that sounds distinctly Blade Runner, that melody also sounds incredibly distracting when stretched out over what's meant to be a calming soundscape. 

In the end, I had to stretch out two tracks to 8× their original length in order to make it to my 3 hour goal (I chose "Rain" for its distinctly Blade Runner beauty and "Wallace" for its iconic throat singing) and I had to actually remix a small segment of "Wallace" to remove one of those distracting tones that would have kept my wife and I up at night – a blasphemous act, no matter how small the change – but in the end the stretched-out 2049 score proved fully capable of supporting the soundscape and providing the 2049 vibe it needed.

Capturing the Sounds of Los Angeles 2049

When I made the original soundscape, I was fortunate enough to have access to decades of fan-made resources, specifically the multitrack bootleg CD "Los Angeles - November 2019" By Esper Productions, which remixes the background audio from the original film to create audio vignettes of locations visited throughout. It proved incredibly valuable in the creation of my version of the soundscape with city sounds, and unfortunately there was nothing of the sort created for 2049, as the film hasn't even been out for a whole year yet.

Again, here's a case of me trying to shove a 2049 peg into a 2019-shaped hole. If I'd started out with a 2049 soundscape, I probably wouldn't even try making a city sounds version. I brainstormed all sorts of ways to get around the issue, such as including generic sound effects that are associated with the movie (such as footsteps through snow and crashing waves) and scrounging up whatever little bits of audio I could find in the movie without dialog over them to try and create some sort of ambient loop out of, neither of which was ideal.

Going back to my Reddit post that I mentioned earlier, I got a big break in the form of a user by the name of SleepyBacteria pointing me in the direction of a SoundCloud page where the sound designers for 2049 had apparently released eight whole minutes of sound effects from the movie without any dialog or score layered over it (the "BR2049 Chime" I mentioned earlier is what you hear in the beginning of this). On this eight-minute-long track alone, I knew I had a fighting chance to make my three-hour-long 2049 soundscape version with city sounds. It was discovering this resource that gave me enough confidence to actually begin developing the soundscape, and I quickly went to work breaking it up into smaller chunks (separating the scenes) so I could be more selective about what I was going to use.

My next big break came when another Redditor by the name of m0rp shared that they had gone and separated all the 5.1 audio channels from both films into individual tracks for sampling. For a few weeks prior to this I had been tinkering with the idea of trying to do this myself since my original plea to Reddit went unanswered, but I wasn't confident that I would be able to do it. Now, however, I had access to all the sounds from the movie that I could play around with myself. While some scenes were still useless to me due to dialog or score being present in every channel, this resource gave me much more freedom in designing my own samples from the movie's sound effects, which is exactly what I did.

With the separate audio channels, I was able to work around score and dialog to create new, "cleaner" ambient mixes to be used in my soundscape. The most challenging of which was the Chinatown scene (pictured above) in which I had to work around the "wub wubs" from the score as well as the dialog between K and Mariette by turning those moments down and replacing them with sounds from other areas of the same scene.

In the original 2019 soundscape with city sounds, I foolishly drag-and-dropped each city sound in manually, adjusting the volume levels multiple times for the same (repeated) sound, and had gaps in between each city sound track. For the 2049 soundscape with city sounds, I wanted the sounds of the city to never leave your ears, and I also really wanted to make work a lot easier for myself. As such, I next created my own 2049 ambience track made up of all the different city sounds that I had made so I could easily loop one track throughout the entire soundscape. I then imported that ten minute track into the overall project, adjusted the volume levels once, and then copy-and-pasted it back-to-back throughout the entire three hours. My suspicion had been correct; it was better to work smarter, not harder.

Wrapping Up

After months of work, I finally had the entire final version of the soundscape in front of me. It looked like this:

Cautiously, I exported both versions of the finished project and got to work on the final steps: listening through them on loop to make sure they work, adding notes (as lyrics), album art, and other information in iTunes, teasing the release to some Blade Runner fan groups, uploading them to Google Drive, creating the YouTube versions, and writing this blog post.

On listening to the non-city-sounds version, I was honestly a bit let down. It was too much more similar to the original 2019 soundscape compared to what I had originally imagined, and the 2049 score made it sound so much less compelling than I'd hoped.

On listening to the city sounds version, however, I was pleasantly surprised. The sounds of the city really brought the track to life in a way I hadn't anticipated. Whereas I prefer the non-city-sounds version of the 2019 soundscape to the city sounds version (and if YouTube views mean anything, so do the rest of you), I consider the version of the 2049 soundscape with city sounds to be far superior to its plain counterpart.

So here I am with one version that's not what I hoped and another that's better than I expected. You know what? After all the work I've put into it, I'm happy with that.

I hope you're happy with it too, Kyle.

Thanks again for reading! Stream them here or click one below. Download links are in the descriptions. And if you happen to like reading short stories or know someone looking for a freelance writer, please check out my true passion over at www.RyanMatejkaWrites.com.

Just the Facts:

• Three hours long
• Fades in and out for interruption-free looping
• Consistent heavy rain throughout
• Two alternating wind chimes every 10 minutes to mark time
• Several short rain variations intermixed approximately in the middle of each chime

Elongated Background Music:

[All tracks stretched with Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch]

• 00:00:24 Sapper's Tree 600% Slower
• 00:10:00 Rain 800% Slower
• 00:28:30 Wallace 800% Slower [Small Ear-Piercing Segment Removed]
• 01:11:48 Memory 600% Slower
• 01:24:50 Someone Lived This 600% Slower
• 01:41:38 That's Why We Believe 600% Slower
• 02:02:32 Her Eyes Were Green 600% Slower
• 02:38:00 All The Best Memories Are Hers 600% Slower

Intro and Outro:

• Clip of unaltered "Rain" by Hans Zimmer & Benjamin Wallfisch plays at start
• "Tears In The Rain" by Hans Zimmer & Benjamin Wallfisch plays at end in place of wind chimes

City Sounds Version Intro and Outro:

[Taken from Sergei Prokofiev’s Peter and The Wolf]

• Begins with Joi Emanator Startup
• Ends with Joi Emanator Shutdown

Why and How I Created a Blade Runner Ambient Soundscape

There are a bunch of awesome Blade Runner ambience projects out there on the web, such as the "Blade Runner Ambience Sounds Of The City 2019" By Curtis8516 which is a 30-minute long track that uses music and effects from the movie and video game to make you feel like you're standing on a street corner in the film's version of Los Angeles in November 2019. There's also the multitrack bootleg CD "Los Angeles - November 2019" By Esper Productions which does something similar but aims to transport you to several distinct locations of the film for a total of 1 hour and 19 minutes.

Those and many others are seriously amazing works by truly dedicated lovers of the film that just go to show how much people love the atmosphere of the classic 1982 cult hit.

However, none of them really gave me what I, personally, was looking for in an ambient Blade Runner soundscape. I wanted an ambient soundscape that was a bit more calming, dreamlike, and meditative. I wanted something that reminded me of the feel of Blade Runner's city without the distracting parts of it like the sudden sound of a passing vehicle, or a loud conversation, or even the incredibly beautiful notes of the iconic soundtrack. I wanted something more subtle.

If You Want Something Done Your Way ... Do It Yourself

One day it occurred to me that it wouldn't be so difficult (or crazy, but that's debatable) to make a Blade Runner soundscape myself. I had experience with sound mixing from my teenage years of making really bad songs out of sound loops, and I had plenty of audio resources to work with.

The goal was simple – whereas other fans had made Blade Runner soundscapes that were intended to make you feel like you were standing on a street corner in Los Angeles 2019 from which you may or may not hear Vangelis' iconic score, I wanted to make something that reminded you of Blade Runner without explicitly calling it out. As I explained it to my friends; others intend to recreate the world while I intend to lull you into it.

I created a folder on my computer specifically for storing the sounds I would use, and took to the internet to download the ones I didn't already have. I downloaded a dozen different ambient rain recordings and a couple wind chimes, then copied over sound effects from the movie I already had as well as some songs from the soundtrack that played as in-world backdrop in the movie.

The final touch I needed was the synths. It was vital that I incorporated iconic sounds of the score without including the songs themselves, because I didn't want to be listening to this thing and get distracted by an iconic track I recognized. To resolve this, I took a few Vangelis tracks from the movie score and stretched them out to upwards of 30 minutes each using Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch. The result was long, moody, and dreamlike. Perfect.

Starting Small

Rather than jump in head first, I decided to experiment with a proof-of-concept soundscape track. I mixed seven minutes that included several short rain samples I had downloaded overlaid on an 800% slowed down version of "Rachel's Theme," as well as a very quiet introduction of the "Blade Runner Blues" and a brief moment of distant wind chimes. The result looked like this:

I decided to keep direct references to the movie (unaltered songs and SFX) very muted while keeping the rain and slowed down song the primary focus. Given that all the rain samples I found were so short, I also needed to experiment with which ones would give the true Blade Runner feel as well as if it was possible to transition seamlessly between different rain effects without drawing attention to this. This is where the most difficulties came in, as I had to mess around with position and volume in order to smooth out the transitions, and it was impossible to simply copy and paste a single rain track over and over since the transition from one end to the next beginning was jarring without extra effort on my end. It was obvious that I needed a longer rain track to work with for the full version whether that meant finding one someone else had recorded/mixed, or mixing my own. Otherwise, the seven minute long track was a success, and it kept me motivated to move on toward the full thing.

The Full Version

I took to YouTube and searched for different long-form ambient rain mixes, hoping to find the perfect one that either lasted at least 3 hours or could be easily looped to last that long. Fortunately, I found a 3 hour long track of gentle rain falling without any songs or thunder that fit the mood I was looking for perfectly, so I downloaded it to use myself.

Using that as the basis, I began constructing my full version. While the new three hour long rain sample I found provided a great basis for the track, I didn't want to let all the shorter samples I'd downloaded go to waste, and decided to mix them into the full version to keep it from being completely repetitive. Additionally, in order to utilize the wind chime samples I'd downloaded in a way that was a bit more practical, I decided to alternate between the two of them every 10 minutes so as to provide a sense of time passage to anyone using the track for meditation.

Next, I had to make sure I had enough of the synthesizers to last the full three hours, so I again used Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch to lengthen a few other Vangelis tracks from the soundtrack that already had a dreamlike quality to them in order to make them even longer and more dreamlike.

Lastly was the harp. I had really wanted to utilize the Gail Laughton track "Pompeii 76 A.D." in the soundscape, as it was used during a brief moment in the film in which several bicyclers are seen riding past the camera and felt ethereal. I tried placing it in between the chimes, but the repetition became too distracting and so I had to try something else. Going back to the mentality of how I used the chimes practically, and keeping in mind that I used an unaltered clip of "Blade Runner Blues" as an introduction to the soundscape, I decided to place this beautiful harp track at the very end of the soundscape in place of the final chime as a way to signal the listener that the soundscape was coming to a close and would soon fade out.

The Alternate Cut – Including Sounds of the City

Blade Runner is famous for it's seven different cuts of the film, so it seems fitting that I ended up making two cuts of the Blade Runner soundscape as well. With it finally completed, I knew that some people might prefer it with a bit of unaltered ambient noises from the movie thrown in for added immersion. Not wanting to disappoint this part of the fanbase, I decided to try it out. Using mostly a few of the tracks from the Esper Productions "Los Angeles - November 2019" bootleg, I inserted several sounds of the city to alternate repetitively throughout the three hour soundscape (keeping the tracks low and quiet to stay true to the intent of the original version) and saved that as an alternate cut. I'd say it turned out pretty good.

Designing a Cover

I'm not a very good visual artist, but when I get this far into a project I tend to go all the way, so I felt compelled to create an album cover for the soundscape that wasn't embarrassing to look at. There was no way I would be able to design something good from scratch myself, so I needed to figure out a way to make the fanciest thing possible utilizing my relatively limited skill set and resources. This led me to find inspiration in a fan-made wallpaper that I found on Reddit wherein a user wanted a high-resolution version of a screenshot from Blade Runner 2049 as their wallpaper, but disliked how the foggy nature of the image gave the impression that it was in fact blurry. To remedy this, they photoshopped the image to appear as if you were looking at it from behind a foggy, rain-soaked window. This is the result:

Not only is this a beautiful image that perfectly captures the vibe of Blade Runner, but I was fairly confident that it was an effect I could recreate myself with a little bit of guidance. I messaged the user who created that image asking for a tip on how to do it myself, and thankfully they replied shortly later with not only how they did it, but they also provided the rainy window overlay they used for me to use in my own version.

I quickly went to work applying the same effect on two iconic images from the original film, resulting in the following images:

While those made neat wallpapers, they weren't much for album covers. I decided to move forward with the second image, resizing it to the square shape of an album cover and adding text in the Blade Runner font (which I downloaded from dafont). Again, keeping my limited visual creative skill in mind, I decided that the easiest way to make the text look good would be to make it look as though it was drawn on the window itself. While this sounds complicated, it seemed far less intimidating to me at the time than picking a solid color that looked okay.

In the end, of course, the text took much longer than everything else about the cover. Using a guide I found online for making it look like someone had finger-drawn words onto a foggy window, I realized that my image was too dark in some places and too bright in others, making certain letters almost impossible to read. I needed a solution to this, and it wasn't something the guide offered. I was left to experiment in the very intimidating Photoshop software all on my own. After quite a bit of trial and error, I realized that I could make the text itself 75% transparent behind the window layer (on which the words were imprinted using some other technique I can't even remember or begin to describe) in order to even out its visibility quite a bit, so I did that.

This was an album cover I could be happy with. It looked somewhat professional and stayed true to the spirit of the movie and the soundscape I had created. The next thing I had to do was make a widescreen version of it to attach to a video version of the soundscape so that I could finally upload that to YouTube. The process of exporting the three hour high-definition video file, despite it being of a static image with music playing, took long enough that I didn't dare try it again when I realized I had made the background image blurrier than I had originally intended. I was stuck with that mistake. I've since convinced myself that it probably looks better that way. Maybe.

Sharing My Work with Everyone

My original plan for spreading this soundscape was to upload it to YouTube, which is a pretty common place for folks to post their soundscape projects, and to provide links to download the MP3 on Soundcloud. While uploading to YouTube went about as well as could be expected given the huge file size (so huge that I've since already deleted the video files to make room on my hard drive), I soon found out that non-paying members of Soundcloud could only upload about three hours of music to their account in total. Even if I hadn't had all those embarrassing songs I made when I was a teenager on there, not even only one of the two versions would work, since they were technically each just barely over three hours long.

After some trial and error with other hosting options, the compromise became clear to me: host the files on Google Drive. That was easy enough.

I was finally done and ready to share my creation with the world.

Anyway...

It was both a headache and a pleasure to make. I've listened to both versions several times myself and have enjoyed them thoroughly. Stream them here or click one below. Download links are in the descriptions.

Thanks for reading!

Just the Facts:

• Three hours long
• Fades in and out for interruption-free looping
• Consistent gentle rain throughout
• Two alternating wind chimes every 10 minutes to mark time
• Several short rain variations intermixed approximately in the middle of each chime

Elongated Background Music:

[Vangelis tracks stretched with Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch]

• 0:00:00 Rachel's Theme 800% Slower
• 0:35:10 Blade Runner Blues 600% Slower
• 1:36:15 Esper Analysis (Longing + Empty Streets) 600% Slower
• 2:35:51 Fading Away 800% Slower

Intro and Outro:

• Clip of unaltered "Blade Runner Blues" by Vangelis plays at start
• Pompeii 76 A.D./Bicycle Riders by Gail Laughton plays at end in place of wind chimes

From 2016 to 2017 - Keeping the Momentum Going

Do you like this new graphic? I made it myself with a photo I took of my beautiful wife.

I felt like I should do some end-of-the-year blogging to get some closure on 2016 and publicly express my goals for 2017, especially after writing a lengthy post/essay titled "Spider-Man or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Reboot" that I then decided not to publish because it was basically just me telling the entire story of my love for Spider-Man and expressing my opinions (that nobody asked for) about the upcoming reboot film.

Concerning My 2016 Resolution

I don't actually remember my primary resolution for 2016, and looking back on last year's review, I didn't really state anything specific. Therefore I'm just going to assume my resolution was to complete the second draft of my novel, which I came very close but ultimately failed to do. I do remember, however, resolving to learn to meditate in 2016, which I did a little bit of throughout the year but not as much as I wanted to.

So what did I actually do this year, then? I read a lot more books (the entire Hitchiker's Guide series, several books in the Detective Bosch series, four books in the Series of Unfortunate Events, The Martian, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, and Childhood's End), watched a bunch of good movies for the first time (La La Land, Sunshine, 10 Cloverfield Lane, Good Will Hunting, The Revenant, the "Before" trilogy, Spirited Away, High Rise, Begin Again, Deadpool, Ghost in the Shell, There Will Be Blood, Victoria, Carol, Room, Sixteen Candles, Straight Outta Compton, Steve Jobs, Brick, 2001 A Space Odyssey, Memento, Sicario, A Scanner Darkly, Snowpiercer, and more), watched some good TV shows (Westworld, Stranger Things, Black Mirror, Game of Thrones, Better Call Saul, Parks and Recreation, etc), discovered some new music and played the occasional video game (mostly on Android).

I also lost my job, found a better one, got a new phone that lets me play Xcom anywhere, put up a fence in my back yard for my dog, started using Instagram, redesigned the blog to actually look like a writer's blog, started writing short stories based on writing prompts (one of which has gained enough attention for two individuals to ask me if they could adapt it into a short film), made new friends, reconnected with old friends, did a lot of hiking, tried out a few different haircuts, and lost 10 lbs.

2017 Resolutions

First and foremost, I really want to get the second draft of my novel finished and start sending it out to publishers. I'm really close thanks to NaNoWriMo, and I really only need to write the ending, rewrite a secondary character's arc, and punch up the humor and charisma in some parts.

Secondly, I just want to keep writing more, especially those writing prompts, and eventually put a few up on the website for public consumption.

Thirdly, ever since experimenting with mixing music again a few weeks ago and seeing the amazing film La La Land in theaters a few days ago with my wife, it's starting to look like I might finally be learning to play an instrument or two. You see, she grew up playing the violin and guitar, but after seeing Ryan Gosling in La La Land and learning that he trained himself in only three months she's been wanting to learn piano (and her parents have a beautiful one in their home that rarely gets used), and I grew up owning a guitar but not knowing how to play it and always wanted to learn to play the keyboard so I could make some music on the computer without relying entirely on pre-recorded loops. So I'll say my tertiary big goal of 2017 is to learn to play piano and/or guitar, but this just came up recently so we'll see if it really sticks.

Fourthly, I should probably continue to lose weight and get in shape. I did some pilates this year, which proved to be quite enjoyable and challenging, tried to get into a routine of exercising (beyond taking my daily walks) at least once a week, and made an effort to eat healthier or smaller portions, so more of that would be good. Now that the wedding has long passed, my biggest motivation to be healthy and in shape is that I want to be able to keep up and play with my future kids as much as possible.

Lastly, I really just want to keep trying new things in my area. For years, I was stuck in a rut of eating at chain restaurants, shopping at chain stores, and going to the same places to do the same old things, but this year my wife and I made a solid attempt of eating and shopping more locally, as well as visiting parks we'd never been to before and just overall trying to attend more community events like concerts, movies in the park, and beer gardens. More of that is always good fun.

And I still want to do more Tactical Laser Tag. Seriously, I only went once this year.

-Ryan

From 2015 into 2016

Firstly, concerning my 2015 resolution

So there's this novel I've been working on since my last semester of college when a bunch of girls in my writing workshop class told me that they loved one of my short stories and wanted more. At the end of last year, I made the resolution to finally finish the first draft of that novel in 2015.

Today is the last day of 2015, and while I did finish the first draft of a novel this year (for the first time), it was for a completely unrelated story that I started and finished during the month of November for NaNoWriMo.

While I admit it's a huge bummer to not have a draft done of that college story yet, I'm proud of what I have accomplished in writing this year. I've written a 50,000 word novel from beginning to end, gotten a freelance job writing for a video game that I truly believe in, and am so incredibly close to finishing that college story that I can taste it!

And now, everything else 2015

This year, I've also been making more friends of coworkers than I thought I would, purchased a house along with my lovely wife, adopted the most adorable and fun dog on the planet, and continued to try eating more vegetables.

As far as my hobbies go, I've read several books (The Girl on the Train, Orange is the New Black, The Black Echo, The Girl with All The Gifts, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Survivor, etc.), seen countless movies (Mad Max, Star Wars, Ex Machina, Nightcrawler, Inside Out, Brooklyn, It Follows, Whiplash, The Guest, John Wick, and so many more), listened to a hell of a lot of music (Halsey, Grimes, The Weeknd, Panic! At The Disco, Melody Gardot, Purity Ring, Nero, and holy crap so much more), but played mostly one video game (Xcom: Enemy Unknown).

So, what about next year?

More. More of everything. More novel drafts, more freelance opportunities, more fun at work, more projects on the house, more playtime with my dog, more books to read, more movies to watch, more music to thrive on, more Xcom (the sequel comes out soon), and - of course - much more time with my amazing, caring, fun, can't-survive-without-her wife!

Maybe not as many more vegetables, though. We're starting to get down to the really weird ones.

Oh yeah, and a million times more Tactical Laser Tag. It has seriously been too long since I did that.

-Ryan

Honesty is More Valuable than Praise

Here's an anecdote:

After most people had left, one of the few remaining guests at the Christmas party I was at happened to be a musician. The hosting family has been known to enjoy his music, so he offered to put in a CD of his, which they were delighted to hear.
"That's me playing the drums on the keyboard," he said during one track, "it's really bad."
I had only just entered the room, and had not heard enough to have an opinion, but it was probably not bad at all. One of the other guests even said "nonsense! It's really good!"
As we passed each other, I chimed in, saying "I thought it was terrible."
"Thanks," he laughed at my sarcastic remark.
After a moment or two of consideration, I realized that this was a fellow creative mind I was in the midst of, and that I understood his nervousness in standing around and listening, waiting to get some sort of feedback and hoping for it to be good. I know what it's like to want to apologize for all the minor flaws that you see in your own work.
I decided to offer up a bit of wisdom on the subject. "Unless people cut you down every once in a while, you'll never get better," I said.
"That's deep," he replied.

I've met creative minds who were terrified of being critiqued. Obviously I didn't actually give the musician a real opinion or advice on his music, since I'd not even really listened to it, but it was nice to meet someone who understood the value of being told your work is crap from time to time.

Always tell me if my work is crap.
-Ryan

The Limitless Impact of Music on Writing

Every author has a ritual when writing. For example one of my favorite authors, Chuck Palahniuk, chooses to write in places like crowded parks where he will be completely and utterly distracted.
I'm a bit different, and what you might consider more traditional, depending on your knowledge of writers.

I prefer to be left isolated in a room with my noise-cancelling headphones on while a steady stream of music drifts into my ears.
Let's get the obvious out of the way; music is inspiring. It is the single greatest medium for expresing emotions and tones. You hear a happy song and you feel like smiling, you hear an angry song and you want to shout it out, or you hear a sad song and get reminded of memories you wish you could forget. The best songs not only do this, but they beg to be sung or played along with, and every time you hear them you can't resist imagining it was you who wrote and performed that song.

My greatest wish when writing is that I can somehow convey that same calibur of emotion through storytelling alone.

This is somewhat the tone I listen to.
Beautiful, yet hiding something darker.

Typically this is where my modest library of soundtracks comes in. Soundtracks are nothing but moods, and they're typically wordless so I don't need to worry about getting distracted and singing along. My stories have always tended to have dark undertones, so two of my favorite soundtracks to fall back on are The Fight Club Soundtrack and The Social Network Soundtrack. It's important to note that these are surely not for everyone, but that in fact Fight Club is my favorite movie and The Social Network's soundtrack was composed by my favorite musician. The two movies also happen to have been directed by my favorite director, so it's no doubt that the reason I fall back on these soundtracks so often is not just because of their quality and parallel tones to what I want to write, but also because these are the movies and people that inspire and influence me.

Another album worth mentioning is, Ghosts I-IV, of which the first nine songs are free to download from that (the official) website. The reason it is great to listen to whilst writing is best explained by the artist's explanation of the album itself: "This collection of music is the result of working from a very visual perspective - dressing imagined locations and scenarios with sound and texture; a soundtrack for daydreams."

The music doesn't have to be wordless or composed for a movie, of course (and not every soundtrack I have is the same tone as those mentioned above). That's just what I tend to fall back on. I've listened to video game music, metal, pop, and all other sorts of music to get me into whatever mood I need. In my most recent novel I've even been experimenting with listening to the favorite style of music or favorite band of whichever particular character I'm focusing on at that instance; that way it's more like I'm getting into the character's head and seeing things from their perspective. It's actually very enlightening.

Perhaps someday a story or two of mine will have their own soundtracks.
-Ryan